I've wanted kids for years. I've watched my siblings have babies and I've watched some of our friends have them. I've gone to baby showers and I've thrown baby showers. And I have to tell you that when I read people venting that they are upset at the sight of other people who are pregnant around them, I can't relate. It's not that I don't wish I was also pregnant. It's that I'm still happy for these people and I don't think everyone else has to pay for our situation.
A colleague of mine has had fertility issues for years. Recently, she ended up adopting a baby. She's really the only one that I have even slightly opened up to about our fertility issues but I have always been really vague. Anyway, one morning she came into my office with a really sad expression on her face and said "were you okay yesterday?" I had no idea what she was talking about. "What was yesterday?" I asked her, thinking she was confusing me with someone else. "Mother's Day" she said with a pout, "was it hard .for you?" Realizing what she was talking about, I explained to her that I hadn't even thought about it. She then told me she bawled every year on Mother's Day and this was the first happy year for her now that they had their son.
I guess I just don't get it. My pain doesn't need to be anyone else's pain. I wouldn't wish this upon anyone.